I called the hosting, it is windows-based hosting.
I checked with the hosting company, they confirmed the name of the relay server.
The hosting does offer php 5.0 scripting.
The email addresses are different, they are web mail accounts with two different companies, the from address is gmail, the to address is with my hosting company.
Is there an email address I can send the file to for you to look at?
Also, a question I asked yesterday that was not addressed is, on the form page, should the action="" be left blank? Other articles I have read seem to have a setting there.